My son is 10.
A few weeks ago my husband found some suspicious Google search terms in the history of our iPad. ‘Vidios of naked girls’ popped up first. It took a second for my brain to register what had happened (after I asked Paul if he was SURE it wasn’t his doing). I then freaked out, totally and completely, and nearly threw up after clicking on a few of the links that he surely saw.
Wtf?? I know this is a different generation. But really? A 10 year old, interested in sex? Maybe we’re naive. Ok, now I realize that we were really clueless. And we should have installed the proper software to ban these sites already. The guilt I feel over not doing this sooner is enormous.
After coming to my senses a little bit, and talking to other moms and a great pediatrician, I realized that A) this IS a different generation and we just need to get used to it – these kids are exposed to so much more than we were, and their innocence is incredibly hard to preserve; B) we DO all need to stop deluding ourselves that our kids are different, ‘younger’ than other 10 years olds; and C) that an event like this is merely another open door to communication, and not something to freak out about.
I did approach my son, after some heavy thinking about what to say, and tried really hard not to make him feel shamed. It was awkward, and he didn’t want to talk about anything, or ask questions about what he saw. I just kept telling him that it’s ok to come to us with any questions, and he will surely see other images down the road that are way too mature for him.
I can’t believe we’ve crossed this threshold, it kind of blows my mind.
Would love to hear from anyone else who’s had this experience!