Our New Venture!

by Trisha-and-Amy on October 15, 2013

AAblogWe are so excited to announce the pre-launch of ASH + AMES, a new social-selling jewelry company that empowers women and gives back to developing countries. We are in Beta testing now — we were in SF last week, and will be in Chicago next week. Here’s some info about the new company. We’ll be updating more as we go…

EMPOWERING WOMEN TO WRITE THEIR NEXT CHAPTERS
For those of you who have enjoyed our books and Lifetime TV show Pretty Wicked Moms, you’ll know that our efforts have always been about empowerment. As moms and women, we all have a unique story…and the opportunity to define the ‘next chapter’ on our own terms. This is in part how ASH + AMES was born – to help smart, savvy moms re-invent themselves and launch their own busi- nesses as ‘Stylists.’

Many of the ASH + AMES pieces – necklaces, bracelets, rings and earrings — have been created uniquely for the brand, while others have been hand-picked and curated from around the world, including Spain, France and Sri Lanka.

GIVING BACK
Giving back is fundamental to the mission of ASH + AMES. As part of our collection, we are showcasing special pieces hand-made from women in developing countries, starting with Haiti. By providing exposure for these wonderful artists, ASH + AMES is helping them perfect their trades while better providing for their families. All proceeds from these sales will be donated back to Haiti.

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New TV Show!

by admin on April 29, 2013

Trisha and I are super excited to announce a new reality show on Lifetime that we are Executive Producing. More details and clips coming soon!

LIFETIME ORDERS NEW Unscripted Comedy PRETTY WICKED MOMS

Set to Premiere June 4, Series Follows Six Competitive Atlanta Moms Breaking All Molds of Traditional Motherhood with Sky High Stilettos and Sassy Attitudes

New York, NY (April 29, 2013) – Ah, the cut-throat, crazy world of competitive mothering…and for six feisty Atlanta mothers in Lifetime’s all-new unscripted comedy Pretty Wicked Moms, it’s a raging, raucous mommy war. Jockeying to be the ultimate mom, this perfectly coiffed and manicured clique will stop at nothing to one-up each other. Whether it’s extravagant birthday parties, devising a strict vegan diet for their one-year-old or masterminding their baby’s social climb (or should we say crawl?) to the top, there’s no end to their plotting and scheming. Knowing the competition among them is fierce, these swanky mothers take motherhood and mischief to an entirely new and outrageous level. As one Pretty Wicked Mom claims, “They all want to be the prettiest, the thinnest, the richest; and their kids to be the smartest.”

The Pretty Wicked Moms, with their adorably fashionable children, high-end lifestyle and hilarious views on motherhood, will grace the small screen on Lifetime, starting Tuesday, June 4, at 10:00 pm ET/PT, immediately following Dance Moms.

Lifetime’s Pretty Wicked Moms include:

Emily: The Queen Bee – A self-made business woman with a two-year-old daughter, Amzie, who serves as ring leader of this group of competitive mothers.
Nicole N.: The Doggy Mom – Emily’s partner-in-crime and co-clique conspirator whose “child” is her Shitzu dog, Summer.
Miranda: The Southern Belle – A rigid stay-at-home mom who oversees her two-year-old son Ledger’s strict schedule down to the very. last. minute.
Nicole B.: The Alpha Mom – Health conscious and meticulous in what she feeds her one-year-old daughter, McKinley, Nicole B. often challenges Emily’s and Nicole N.’s mischievous plans.
Meredith: The Newbie – Recently moved to Atlanta with her husband and three-year-old daughter, Addison, Meredith’s good heart and innocence lead her to strive for acceptance from the other moms.
Marci: The Divorcee – The most affluent, and shrewdest mom of the clique, Marci is raising three kids on her own after 23 years of marriage, bringing a different point-of-view to motherhood and the clique as they live life in the fast lane.

Lifetime has ordered nine episodes of Pretty Wicked Moms, which is produced by Ellen Rakieten Entertainment. The series is executive produced by Ellen Rakieten, Fiona Kennedy, Chris Costine, Paul Barrosse, Trisha Ashworth and Amy Nobile, alongside Rob Sharenow, Gena McCarthy and Noah Pollack of Lifetime.

ABOUT LIFETIME

Lifetime is committed to offering the highest quality entertainment and information programming, and advocating a wide range of issues affecting women and their families. In 2012, as a result of its aggressive triple threat programming strategy doubling its amount of original programming spanning scripted dramas, reality series and movies, Lifetime posted its strongest year-on-year growth among the key demographics in 10+ years, while also reaching its youngest median age in 16 years. Lifetime Television®, LMN®, Lifetime Real Women® and Lifetime Digital™ are part of Lifetime Entertainment Services, LLC, a subsidiary of A+E Networks. A+E Networks is a joint venture of the Disney-ABC Television Group and Hearst Corporation.

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Oh No He Didn’t…

by admin on March 19, 2013

My son is 10.

A few weeks ago my husband found some suspicious Google search terms in the history of our iPad. ‘Vidios of naked girls’ popped up first. It took a second for my brain to register what had happened (after I asked Paul if he was SURE it wasn’t his doing). I then freaked out, totally and completely, and nearly threw up after clicking on a few of the links that he surely saw.

Wtf?? I know this is a different generation. But really? A 10 year old, interested in sex? Maybe we’re naive. Ok, now I realize that we were really clueless. And we should have installed the proper software to ban these sites already. The guilt I feel over not doing this sooner is enormous.

After coming to my senses a little bit, and talking to other moms and a great pediatrician, I realized that A) this IS a different generation and we just need to get used to it – these kids are exposed to so much more than we were, and their innocence is incredibly hard to preserve; B) we DO all need to stop deluding ourselves that our kids are different, ‘younger’ than other 10 years olds; and C) that an event like this is merely another open door to communication, and not something to freak out about.

I did approach my son, after some heavy thinking about what to say, and tried really hard not to make him feel shamed. It was awkward, and he didn’t want to talk about anything, or ask questions about what he saw. I just kept telling him that it’s ok to come to us with any questions, and he will surely see other images down the road that are way too mature for him.

I can’t believe we’ve crossed this threshold, it kind of blows my mind.

Would love to hear from anyone else who’s had this experience!

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This quote really resonated so much: “It’s not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves, that will make them successful human beings.” (Ann Landers)

Today while helping my 8 year-old daughter with homework (and rolling my eyes behind her back for making me get up out of my seat 14 times in quick succession), I realized that there are a number of things a lot of us parents do to enable our children and dissuade them from being independent thinkers and doers, and therefore molding them into bewildered adults (who surely will later blame us for everything anyway).

So, here goes, kids. I hereby vow to:

–Not help you with your homework. I will CHECK your homework, but only AFTER you’ve truly made your best attempt and completed an assignment, even if it’s wrong. No one ever helped me with homework! Seriously, people.

–Not ask you what you want for dinner. I am going to make ONE meal, and you will either eat it, or be hungry.

–Not lay out your clothes, and if you walk downstairs looking like something out of Alice in Wonderland, I will smile and say ‘you look great!’

–Not tell you that every single art project, or song you sing, or math problem you do is ABSOLUTELY PERFECT. Instead I will ask you questions about that neon pink clay cat: “What was your favorite part about making it?”

–Not get caught up in your every disappointment or fear. Maybe if I show you that I’m not freaked out that bad or scary things happen, you will follow my lead.

–Not go crawling around your room to find your dirty clothes and stinky socks. You can surely figure out how to get a load of laundry going, and then put it in the dryer. (You DEFINITELY will figure this out once you have no underwear or shirts to wear to school.)

–Not fix you cereal or other simple meals. And when the milk spills all over the counter, I will point you in the direction of the dish towels.

–ALWAYS, always, be here for you. To listen, to hug, to offer a shoulder, to giggle with. And to cry behind your back when you walk away from me on your way into school, giving me that ‘I’m a big kid now, Mom’ smirk and half-hearted wave.

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The Irony of It All…

by admin on January 17, 2013

Was talking to Trisha this morning (her daughter Alex turned 13 today! My god…really??) and we were both teary eyed over how fast the time seems to be whizzing by now. WHY oh why does the first five years with our tiny kids go by SO slowly?? It seems like torture…we are constantly thinking about how ‘it will just be better when they’re 2…when they’re 3….oh….didn’t anyone tell you about the f*cking FOURS?!? Oh when they’re in Kindergarten you’ll FINALLY get half a day to yourself….but in FIRST grade, you will get the whole DAY…’

And now, here we stand, with one teenager, and four tweens living with us. And the time seems to be escaping us. It’s going way too fast, and we can’t help but feel melancholy about it. Our kids are excited to move forward, to get older, to do more on their own. And we agree that our purpose as parents is to give them the wings to fly. But damn….this is waaaay harder than we could have anticipated. We’re finding ourselves saying the things we know we shouldn’t to them….”I don’t want you to get any older…why do have to grow up so fast?”

It’s a cruel, cruel reality of motherhood that no one prepares you for. The irony of it all….the years you spend wishing they were self sufficient, just a little older…will come back around to bite you in the ass. And all of a sudden, you understand those weird grandmas in the supermarket who looked at your sleep-deprived face and nearly cried on top of your cranky baby, lamenting with tears in their eyes that they would give an arm to have just one sleepless night with their newborn again.

We get it now.

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7 Things To Embrace Right Now

by admin on December 18, 2012

It’s been so tough these past few days, seeing all that’s happened in Newtown, CT. As a parent, it’s unfathomable. With each new photo of these sweet angels that we see, our hearts break a little more.

We are shielding our kids from most of it — they don’t need to feel this kind of pain. And we all have to be sensitive to our kids — and not freaking them out with a house blasting the details over CNN, thinking that they don’t hear it or absorb the heaviness. Or with us suddenly crawling into their beds at night, hugging them a little longer or too tight. Although that’s something we’ll probably do for days or weeks to come, selfishly.

In the wake of it all, we feel helpless. I find myself pacing around the house, not knowing where to put my energy, trying to avoid the TV or Facebook, since it’s all just focused on details of the tragedy that are almost unbearable to hear or see.

Here are 7 things to — well, just DO — right now. Not sure if this will help anyone else feel better, but it’s how I’ve occupied the last few days.

1. Find just one child in your community who you know is in need of something — a coat, a Christmas gift, a warm meal, a playmate — and help out, right now, and involve your kids. My son told us about a boy he met on a local sports team, who said he’d never had his own skateboard and really wanted one, but wasn’t sure Santa would come through. We went together to buy one for him, and anonymously mailed it to his house.

2. Have a dance party. Not a lame, half hearted one though. Pick 5 or 6 songs that you and your kids LOVE and blast them. The only requirement is that everyone must dance until they are sweating.

3. Videotape your kids. Just talking, singing, laughing. Capture their spirit, their sweet smiles, right this minute.

4. Write down how you feel about them. Grab a journal (it doesn’t have to be perfect or pretty) and write each child’s name on it. Keep them somewhere special, and even if it’s once a year, jot down something about them you’re amazed by, or proud of.

5. Take a bubble bath. Alone. It’s ok. We all want to spend every minute being good moms, especially right now, but if we don’t take care of ourselves, we’re no good to anyone. P.S. Bubble baths are always better with a glass of bubbly.

6. Say no. ‘Can you watch my three kids for just an hour tomorrow?’ No. ‘Can you take my cat for two days while we leave town?’ No. See? It’s easy! We need to say no sometimes to just breathe, and open the door to something else we want to do (or just give ourselves permission to do NOTHING).

7. Breathe. No, really. Just breathe. Stop what you’re doing, right now. Close your eyes. Take four or five loooong deep breaths, in through the nose, out through the mouth. Make a sound on the out. Do this several times a day, or whenever you’re feeling stressed. It’s small, but it really makes a difference.

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Tonight I was putting my 8 year-old daughter to bed, and she had tears brimming in her eyes. I asked what was wrong, and she said, “I don’t know…I just feel sad. Does that ever happen to you? What if I’m sad about something and I don’t even know why?” She looked down and silent tears fell down her sweet almost-not-a-baby-anymore cheeks.

Moments like these make me pause and take a long breath. Yes, she’s only 8. But if someone had told me, when I was 8, that there would be moments in life where I just felt SAD, and didn’t know quite why, and that it was okay, and that tomorrow would maybe, probably, be a bit better, well that would’ve been a great thing to hear. And how many times have I, as an adult, felt like this?

Then she looked at me and asked, “Why does the world have to be so BIG?” And just then, as a 43 year-old looking at an 8 year-old, I felt totally connected to her. “It does feel big, doesn’t it? So overwhelming sometimes. And sometimes, it just feels good to CRY and not really know why.”

Sometimes, even if we don’t have the perfect answer, it’s good enough to just be present, and there, in the moment, with our kids. And let them feel what they feel, and push away the urge to ‘fix’ anything.

And it’s good for them to see us a little bewildered, too.

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Pet Shaming is the New Kid Shaming…

by admin on November 1, 2012

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I met a new friend the other day and the attraction was instant. There was the initial introduction, where do your kids go to school, ‘oh we have so-in-so in common’ but then — miraculously — we dove deep, and there it was, in all it’s glory — a REAL, authentic, self-effacing mom who was laughing about her short-comings and wondering WHY more moms don’t just come right out and admit how HARD motherhood is (and don’t even get her STARTED on the marriage thing).

She admitted all kinds of fantastic things — how she hates laundry so much that she’s downgraded her car so that she could hire a cleaning lady. How she’s massively in love with her eldest child at the moment but pretty much can’t stand her middle one, who constantly whines and picks her nose. How she can’t stand most of the moms at school because the fake banter about how GREAT everything is drives her seriously mad, forcing her to hide out wearing a black hoodie during drop offs and pick ups. And how, when she drops the kids off at school, she high tails it back home, closes all the shades and watches at least ONE episode of Real Housewives all by herself, in the dark, sipping her coffee, slowly.

I fell in mommy love, hard.

But why is it so tough for most moms to just let go of all the expectations of being perfect, especially to each other? The more we show our true selves, the more we can bond together, and create a waaay better environment to share thoughts, strategies and dirty little secrets. And realize that we’re really kind of all the same, just in different, imperfect ways.

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